Hello, this is reporter Joe Bob. Breaking news! There was a man found stabbed face-first into the Yarra river at 7:50 pm. The witness saw a teenager crawling out of the other side of the river. The teen gave away nothing but he is still our prime suspect. ” I was just having a swim with the fish when I saw the two legs sticking out of the river so then I swam to the shore.” he said. No-one belives him. The police tried to get the legs out but they are stuck. “The legs are jammed in.” said a police officer.